Release this fear. It’s popping up because you’re making moves. You’re taking action. You’re setting intention. Big things are coming – you can feel it in your bones. They’re rattling with the restlessness that you can’t shake. This restlessness is edging you forward. It’s buzzing with the momentum the stardust is stirring in your core. Your sacrum is alight with redirection. Your Kundalini is stirring and unraveling.
It’s time. You don’t know how it’s happening, but it’s happening, and the best thing to do is hold the reigns loosely and don’t let go. Practice switching perspectives between what’s right in front of you and what lies beyond, what you can’t yet know. Practice imagining the unknown. Practice molding it in your mind’s eye, projecting prisms of possibility into the future you can almost taste.
Implement rest. Surrender to relaxation. Allow the static to rise and fall, squeal and fade. Take what you can when you can. Try not to get overwhelmed – the downloads are dazzling and screaming. It’s not just you – others can hear it, they just don’t know what it is. They don’t know how to interpret it yet. But you do.
You’ve got to help them. You’ve been noticing the patterns, scrying the stars, spreading the cards. You’ve been doing this your entire life. You’ve come to learn the language, and you’re still learning every day. The time to share this knowledge is now. The time to be a conduit for the unseen is upon you. The energy to put everything you’ve learned into practice is available to you.
Harness it. Embrace it. Claim it. Make it your own and let it flow. Succumb to its power and infuse it with your light. Make magic. Shapeshift. Engage in alchemy. Transform this ash into gold. Rise for no one but yourself and see everything you’ve been denying. And then rise for all of those still pushing through the rubble. Be their beacon. Stand and assume your position as lighthouse. As torch bearer. You’ve earned it.
You’re a fucking warrior. You’re the archer, lighting your arrows aflame and aiming them higher than you ever conceived. Higher than you ever believed possible. Higher than you ever allowed yourself to aim.
You’ve slayed your dragons and broken the gnarly teeth those airy demons flashed at you. You’re wiping the blood and shrapnel from your sword onto your sleeve. You’re not just closing, but demolishing those ancient doors that held you boxed in. The light is shining through – for you. Yes, for you. It’s that self worth that you’ve been looking for, and not trying to recover, because it’s not something that was ever allowed to bloom. You’ve built it – developed it from nothing.
You. Never forget that. Tattoo it across your chest if you need to be reminded every day. Chant it, sing it, write it. Be it. Take it with you every time you feel afraid, knowing you’ve faced down far worse than what you’re up against now. Now’s a different time.
Truly, it is. Every second is a different time. Every day is a new chance, especially today. Right now, ask yourself what you want. Ask yourself, if you could have anything, be anywhere, do anything, what would that look like? If you didn’t have to figure out the how’s and the when’s and the what’s and the who’s, how would you feel about going for everything you’ve ever wanted?
Don’t even ask yourself what’s been holding you back, because that’s what you’ve been stuck on, isn’t it? That’s the only thing that’s been bulldozing your thoughts, your ambitions, your will to make it all so. You’ve done the internal work – you’ve drowned in introspection. You’ve navigated through the sludge. And here you are – still here.
So, what are you going to do with “still here”? What do you want to fill the space the sludge used to occupy? What garden will you tend? What do you want to see grow?
Sit. Rest. Think about this. Grant yourself space and time to envision. And then create. The energy and power are all around you, but it will leave you. It will pack it’s bags just as quickly as you have if it feels neglected, rejected, ignored. Disrespected. So respect it. Acknowledge it. Welcome it. Embrace it. Use it. Become it.
Set some intentions today. To believe in yourself more. To love yourself more. To never settle. To work for more. To stop being your worst critic. To speak with more kindness, especially towards yourself. To love yourself. To love yourself. To love yourself, and make way for the better that more love welcomes. Wants. Needs.
Step into yourself and step forward into the present, fear be damned. Commit to being bigger than fear. Commit to changing your thoughts. Commit to changing your life.
The integrity and quality of your – of our – future depends on it. Do what you’re here to do, and do it with all you’ve got. We’ve got less and less time to rise every day, so rise now, rise tall and rise the fuck out of that abyss that’s rendered you blind.
Goddamn am I fucking sick of writing this shit.
And that’s it. That’s the green light. When you can no longer handle reading your own bullshit, the words that represent you dragging your feet through life because you’re so simultaneously terrified of both failing and succeeding. This is the point when you’ve got no choice but to go forward because you’ve got nothing left to go back to. You want out so bad that the only way to go is in. This is the still point of the void – the point where potential rests. Where miracles manifest.
Alright, so here I go. I’ve already screamed and cried and crumpled. I’ve rambled all my intentions out to the almighty mighty’s. I’m going to surrender to this wave because I’ve literally got nothing left to lose. Nothing.
I am nothing. Absolutely nothing. And from here, I hope to create something, anything that’s better than everything I ever mistakenly thought I was.
I think this is when change happens. I think this is when new directions materialize. I think this is destruction and baptism. I think this is exactly what I’ve been reaching for all along.
I think this is my endpoint, this brink, which is exactly where the rest of everything – the best of me – begins.
Jillian Locke 